Monday, March 31, 2014

Trader Joe's Shopping Trip

Trader Joe's is probably one of my new favorite stores. I had never heard of them until I started finding their products popping up all over my Instagram about a year ago. I kept seeing a lot of Weight Watcher followers posting awesome findings and I searched where there was one in my area. It turned out there was not one in my immediate area here in Florida, it was in Sarasota, about an hour and half away.

But I did find one in NY which was right by the airport. So last year when I traveled home, I asked my mom to take me to there, so I could finally check it out and pick up some goodies I had heard about.

Well I feel in love. And each time I go home now, I stop by there to pick up some more goodies. The only problem is, there is so much I want to get but because I am traveling and only home for a week, I can't get a lot.

So here is some things I got from my last trip home...

Inner Peas: Crunchy, pea snacks that are baked and not fried.
Cookie and Cocoa Swirl Butter: Seriously it is like crack in a bottle. I cant have it around too much or I just eat the whole thing. I say just one spoonful and then bam, I am standing in the dark, eating it in the closet. Seriously, it has happened before.
Dark Chocolate Edamame: Really awesome, sweet and salty treat. I was starting my period when I went shopping, so my taste buds were on over drive.
Coconut Oil: I have been dying to try something like this and it was a great price.
Mango Black Tea: A nice alternative to my coffee addiction and I love anything and everything Mango.
Spiced Mango: See! Dried, spicy chilly mango. OMG best thing ever!
Cookie Butter Candy Bar: Didn't really need it, but couldn't pass it up. Turned out to be amazing.
Puffin Cereal: I have seen it a lot  and wanted to try the same with
Panda Puff Cereal in Peanut Butter
Granola: Anything with coconut and Chia goes in my cart for sure.

I have since tried everything I purchased and they are my top favorite Trader Joe's items. Some things I have to limit, such as the mango and cookie butter, because when I get them in the house, they do not last long, I seriously have no self control.

Now yesterday I was able to check out our new Trader Joe's here in Tampa. Tampa is about 30 minutes away from me, while it will be harder to get my frozen mochi and ice cream I would love to try with Trader Joe's because of the heat and drive, I was able to pick up some other items that I normally didn't get. I think with anything frozen, I will bring some ice and a cooler. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

Haul 1

Mixed Frozen Red, Yellow, Green Peppers
BBQ Chicken Teriyaki
Classic California Roll with Brown Rice- which I had for lunch
Lemon Chicken and Arugula Salad- Also for lunch, only downfall, not enough chicken
Spinach and Kale Greek Yogurt Dip- AWESOME
Honey and Mango Greek Yogurt
Belela Mix- which is chick peas and some olive oil and peppers, I could eat it from the container.

Haul 2

Inner Peas- I LOVE THEM
Dark Chocolate Almond Bark Thins- probably a bad mistake, but come on, dark chocolate and almonds I am game
Seasoned Brussels- Had them for dinner, so good and easy
Butternut Squash- I roasted it, so good.
A bag of sweet potatoes- Couldn't pass that up, because it was only 1.69

Haul 3

Red Quinoa
Sweet Potato Bisque Soup and Tomato
Organic Apricots
Medjool Dates- I ate them with Almond Butter and it has changed my life for sure

So here you go some of my favorite items from Trader Joe's. There are so many things I want to try out there, so stay tuned for the fun finds I will find.

If you have shopped at Trader Joe's before, what is and are your favorite items???

Sunday, March 30, 2014

A perfect day off done my way..

Ever have one of those days where everything just seemed to just fall into place??!!

You were able to get everything you wanted to get done, nothing stood in your way, just had a great day all the way around?!!

Today was one of those days for me...and I needed one like this for sure.

While the morning was a bit sad, I had to bring James to the airport. Considering we both have family in two different states, we tend to take vacations separate. We actually have never really "vacationed" together. Sure we have gone on stay cations and such, but gone away, away together, nope has never happened. It is hard for us to schedule those kind of vacations because we only really get to see our families once or twice a year, when we get to, its nice to go alone, so we can spend nothing but quality time with them.

So anyway, I had to drop him off and I hate to see him go for a week. I get lonely here in the apartment without him, especially at night. And well, despite if we fight and such, I love that man to death and I don't like being without him. But I know he will have a great time and enjoy lots of family fun, so I put on a brave face. And we skype when we can, so it's nice.

Since I had to drop him off in Tampa and I was up early, I figured I would head over to Bayshore to run Bayshore Blvd, the same area I ran for Gasparilla. I wanted to get a long run in any today since Iron Girl is in 2 weeks. I cant believe it. Two weeks and I will be running my 6th Half Marathon and I accomplished this all in 13 months, crazy to me, still!

I love running Bayshore when I can, which is rare. I don't get over to Tampa often, so this was a real treat. The only problem is there are no water stations or rest areas on the route, so I have to plan right so I don't have anything weird come up. I didn't bring my fuel belt with me because the weather didn't seem too hot, I even had to put a long sleeve shirt on. Well if one thing I have learned with Florida, the weather is deserving. I could have used some water and that long sleeve was not needed.

The run was good, it still took me a good 3 miles to get my rhythm going. My legs did not hurt as much as they have recently, which was a big help, but at times I still felt like I was really struggling. I don't know if it is the weather or my shoes, or what but it definitely takes awhile for me to get going. But I pushed through and finally the run just felt great.

When I have moments like this, where I feel like I want to give up, or stop, or get frustrated, I talk myself out of it. I mean there are times where I am literally screaming at myself in my head, but I just chant over and over that I can do it, and it does work. I try to push the pain I have out of my head and focus on just finishing. I think of things I want to do when I am done with my run, I think of stuff in the future and before I know it, I am just running.

Even though it was getting hot, the warm sun felt great. And as horrible as I look, I 
never feel more alive then when I am running...

Bayshore really has some gorgeous views of the bay. This is my Sunday service..

I planned for 8 miles and I got in 8 miles. It was a nice run and I am so glad that I took the time to come out there this morning. The view and area alone is so worth it.

And a pretty awesome way to kick off a day off and Sunday and burned almost a 1000 calories too.

After my run, since I was in Tampa I figured I would go and check out the Trader Joe's that just opened. I knew it would be packed for a Sunday, so I was glad I could get there early. They have been open for a week and everyone is going. Since I have been to one before, I wanted to pick up items I wasn't able to get because of flying back to FL from NY, so basically more perishable and frozen items. 

The store looked great and laid out pretty much the same. I got some really great stuff to try, I will post tomorrow, that way I can make a whole post about it.

From Trader Joe's and able to beat the lines, I went to Target because I mean, who doesn't love Target and since I was out, why the heck not. I could walk around Target for hours and I actually limited myself to just a few items, even though I never seem to make it out of there empty handed. 

I did find 3 really awesome items, I am excited about.

The Banana Walnut trail mix was an impulse, I can not pass up a tasty and new trail mix. 

The Justin's Vanilla Almond Butter was something I have been looking for forever!! I could not find it anywhere, not even Whole Foods, so when I saw that, I snatched it so quickly. I also have tried it today and it is wonderful! I am officially obsessed with almond butter.

I have read and heard about Yurbuds recently and to find them at half off and in pink, I seriously could not pass them up. They are made for women with small ears. I have the worst times with ear buds and the ones I have I love, but they are a little worn out now, 3 years and now they are falling out a bit. So when I saw these, even though I didn't really need them I grabbed them at such a great price.

After my Target trip, I swung by CVS, so I could pick up some things and use some coupons I had with them. I came home after, feeling pretty awesome and from having a great day out. I made lunch and then took myself to our pool for about an hour and half. Seriously the day was gorgeous, but that Florida sun, can be killer. I finished two magazines while laying out and have started my tan. I vow to do this more often for sure on my days off.

The sun was tiring me out and since I was up at 5 and ran around all morning, I was ready for a nap. Then I passed out, literally for almost 3 hours. I tell ya, when my body wants rest, it wants rest.

I was excited to cook dinner tonight because I had a lot of goodies I got from today to cook with...

Some red quinoa, Chicken burger with avocado and srirachia, Brussels sprouts and butternut squash. All power foods and delicious and then I popped in Frozen, which I am probably the last person to see it in the world. It turned out to be the cutest movie and every song is stuck in my head.

Ending my night soon with a dessert, hopefully a call from my love and some light reading. 

Perfect Sunday and day off.

I need more like these!

Friday, March 28, 2014

Nook Book: Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn

First off this book was fantastic!

Before downloading it to my Nook, I heard so many awesome things about the book and tons of reviews. Then I saw that they were making it into a movie, starring Ben Affleck and I knew it was finally time to read it. I bought it while I was on vacation a couple of weeks ago and I read it in about 3 days. I couldn't put it down.

From the first page to the last page it was a non stop intense, suspenseful thriller. I usually don't go for books that have suspense or a book by someone I am unfamiliar with but I rolled the dice and so glad I did. I really loved the cat and mouse idea of the book. The way the chapters and dialogue that was used was each chapter was the two main characters talking to you, the reader. I found myself becoming one and finding a love for the characters and couldn't wait to see what was going to happen next.

I am excited for the movie, which I just found out it is going to be released in October and see if they can portray the same intensity and drama like the book.

Here is the summary of the book, I got from Barnes and Nobles:

On a warm summer morning in North Carthage, Missouri, it is Nick and Amy Dunne’s fifth wedding anniversary. Presents are being wrapped and reservations are being made when Nick’s clever and beautiful wife disappears from their rented McMansion on the Mississippi River. Husband-of-the-Year Nick isn’t doing himself any favors with cringe-worthy daydreams about the slope and shape of his wife’s head, but passages from Amy's diary reveal the alpha-girl perfectionist could have put anyone dangerously on edge. Under mounting pressure from the police and the media—as well as Amy’s fiercely doting parents—the town golden boy parades an endless series of lies, deceits, and inappropriate behavior. Nick is oddly evasive, and he’s definitely bitter—but is he really a killer? 
   As the cops close in, every couple in town is soon wondering how well they know the one that they love. With his twin sister, Margo, at his side, Nick stands by his innocence. Trouble is, if Nick didn’t do it, where is that beautiful wife? And what was in that silvery gift box hidden in the back of her bedroom closet?

And just when I thought I had the book figured out, BAM, it turned me right around.

If you want to read something different and an easy, fun, intense read that you can not put down, do yourself a favor and get this book. Makes for a perfect rainy day or beach read. I will be reading more from this author also, I really enjoyed her style.

When my body says rest, I rest...

Whew is all I can say.

These last two days have been crazy, long, exhausting, hurting and did I say exhausting. At work we had to do a relocation of one of our stores and it was two days of non-stop work. Wednesday was the day of non stop moving of boxes and pulling carts, picking up and putting down heavy, product filled boxes. My legs were so tired since the 10 miles from Sunday and on Tuesday I did a nice 30 minute toning ball and strength work out.

Not the best of ideas and on Wednesday I also ran 3 miles in the morning.

So needless to say Wednesday I was tired and hurting and we didn't get done until 2:00 am. But I fueled myself for the long day with protein shakes, a Subway turkey and veggie sandwich and a QuestBar, almonds and cheese sticks. Plus I earned a nice amount of activity points from all the movement.

Yesterday was another very long day of setting up the whole store. We moved and grooved from 8:30-7, and sat for a lunch which I made the choice of a salad and a chicken breast wrap. I had a light breakfast in the morning from the hotel of oatmeal and a yogurt and a Quest Bar as a snack. I had some grilled chicken nuggets on the ride home and then had a bowl of cereal for dinner when I got home.

Sore from the last couple of days, Thursday my arms and biceps were sore. I was beat. I went to bed early for me last night and slept for almost 10 hours.

Today I got up and I was still exhausted. I made some breakfast and then just kind of laid around catching up on my DVR. I was really thinking about going for a quick run, but my mind and body was so tired. I mean really, really beat. All I could think about was a nap, so I went back to sleep for 2 more hours.

What the heck is wrong with me???

I didn't realize how tired I was and how much rest I really don't get. I am always on the go on my day's off, just moving and moving, and gaining lots of activity. So even though it killed me a little bit to not run, I know my body needed just a little less. Today I used it has a complete rest day, I haven't done any laundry, cleaning or anything that consumes my mind 24 hours a day and I have to admit it has been nice.

I have been doing some social media stuff, watching TV and just hanging out. I like this and I really need to do this once in a while, even though I had vacation not too long ago, I threw myself back into everything so quickly and at once. And that is where I am at. I am here just enjoying it all for the day.

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Weekly Weigh I

Okay so my weigh in this week was a gain.

I knew it was going to happen, I was on PMS overload last week. I mean seriously I don't know what was going on with me, I was craving anything and everything. I almost ate a box of reduced fat Cheez It's in one sitting. Every time I picked up something crunchy and salty, it was over!

Don't even mention the chocolate covered peanuts we had in the house.
They didn't stand a chance.

But despite the fact that I went a wee bit crazy on the salty and sweet, I did make some good decisions. I drank a ton more water than I normally do, which is a big deal for me. I took a vitamin every single day and I made sure I ate 2-3 servings of some sort of veggie every single day.

But the carbs won me over last week and despite the fact I got a 10 mile run in on Sunday, the damage was done.

I am okay with the slight gain this week, not happy but okay because I know it is not the end of the world. I am not giving up or backing done, I am owning the gain and moving on. Plus I am learning from this crazy week of PMS so I am better prepared next month.

Men, you read, you are so lucky to not have this craziness, once a month, it lasts a week and drives you over the edge.

So after my weigh in today, I went to the grocery store to pick up some staples in my house. For example, fat free cottage cheese, pickles, special K 70 and 90 calorie bars, almonds, spaghetti squash, pre cut up fruit, Chobani 100 calorie yogurt, fat free cool whip and some strawberries.

I will be out of town for the next two days for work and I am bringing along some Quest Bars, smoothie mixes and easy, quick snacks, but some of this stuff was too good to pass up.

Friday I am off so I plan to hit up some Aldi and then Trader Joe's on Sunday. We just got one in Tampa and I am so excited. I think I'll do a post on Sunday about my haul from there and what I got from there last week.

After my quick grocery shop I came home and indulged in a home made salad. I was a bit hungry and instead of grabbing some carb tastic items, I made a salad with fat free Italian dressing, cucumbers, carrots and cherry tomatoes and topped it with some rice crackers I had from a Graze box, which by the way you have to get. Graze box is awesome.

I am all over the place today, but I have tons of post ideas coming your way.

I decided to take a rest day from running but wanted to get some strength and core fitness in. So I YouTube some workouts and got a great 30 minute work out in with my light weights and 8lb toning ball.

I am feeling it already. I plan to make this a part of my routine. I have a good 15-20 pounds to lose to hit my goal weight and I am going for it. No more of this plateau. I hate the roller coaster and I am going for some loss, which means I need to increase my activity with different routines.

Even though a gain this week, I am on track to see result next week. But hey I did enjoy the week I had, even with the snack attacks lol.

Sunday, March 23, 2014

South of the Border Hash Brown Bake

This recipe is quick, easy and can be eaten all week, which I love when it comes to cooking, especially for the morning.

I found this recipe in my Weight Watchers Weekly that I got when I weighed in and had to modify the ingredients a bit to fit what I had in the house and glad I did because it came to 1 point less when I did.


2 cups (16 ounces)  Liquid Egg Whites
1/2 cup of fat free milk
1 Package of Simply Potatoes Shredded Hash Browns- I used mine frozen, seemed fine
15 ounces ( 1 Can) black beans, drained and rinsed
11 ounces (1 can) corn niblets, drained
1/2 cup of canned diced tomatoes, drained
2 cups of Reduced Fat Shredded Cheese- Mexican Blend would be great
3 Tablespoons of fresh cilantro


1. Heat oven to 350 degrees. Spray 13x9-inch glass baking dish with nonstick cooking spray. In a large bowl combine liquid egg whites and milk, mix well. Add hash browns, black beans, corn, tomatoes and 1 cup of cheese. Stir to mix well. Pour into prepared baking dish. Bake for 40-45 minutes or until center is set and edges are brown.

2. Sprinkle top with remaining 1 cup of cheese. Continue baking for 3-5 minutes or until cheese is melted. Sprinkle with cilantro.

Let stand for 5 minutes before serving.

Makes 12 servings.
3pp for a serving

Looks and smells amazing and because I prepared ahead of time James and I have breakfast for the whole week, which saves me time and money. Win!

Saturday, March 22, 2014

Blah Week

Wow this week has kind of been a crappy one. I have had such a hard week getting my groove back. Not sure how Stella did it so quickly but damn this week has been anything but easy. I, of course got my lovely monthly friend and it rocked my world. Which makes sense to why I was having such a bad week running, my body was just completely off. I mean completely off. I have been trying to work through it this week but it really has been tough. And besides my body feeling extremely tired, sore, fatigued, headaches and muscle aches, my eating has been cooko bananas too. It is crazy how much you crave when you have your monthly friend. I mean I had gone from crunchy and sweet.

So that is where I have been this week, just in a funk. Glad the week is over and tomorrow I am off from work and the first thing I am going to do is get a nice long run in. Shooting for 10 miles and really hoping for a gorgeous morning.

Just a little update, here's to a new week looking bright.

Thursday, March 20, 2014

Nook Book: Uganda Be Kidding Me

I am a very big Chelsea Handler fan. I DVR her show, Chelsea Lately every night and I have read every single one of her books. I think she is smart, funny, sassy and a great model that women can truly do anything and don't have to kiss ass to do it. She is definitely someone I would want to be best friends with.

Her third book Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang is my favorite

Her newest book is...

Which is now my second favorite. Plus I seriously love her dog Chunk, I want one just like him.

This book was great. I started it on Monday before my flight, I finished it the same day. I could not put it down and laughed my way through all 183 pages. I seriously probably freaking out my flight neighbor from random bursts of laughter. This book was about all her travels and it was hysterical the things and events she gets herself into. This book had some really rare moments in the book too, that showed the true side of Chelsea, which I really appreciated.

I downloaded the book to my Nook of course and glad I did. The book also had some personal pictures and her guide to traveling, which of course is ridiculous. With this book release, Chelsea is also going on tour. She is coming to Clearwater in May and I would love to see her, I really am considering it.

If you want a good laugh and an easy read that is quick and takes you away for a bit, download, rent, sign out or buy this book for sure. You will burn calories just from laughing alone.

Have you read any Chelsea books?

Which one is your favorite?

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Runner Problems

First and foremost this post is pretty embarrassing and very much TMI! If you don't want to read, no problem, but despite this being not one of my most proudest moments, I have to laugh about it. If you know me, you know I would tell you this story in person also, so I figure why the heck not, I mean that's the whole idea of a blog, correct?

Okay, so after work today I was all about getting a couple of miles in. The weather was gorgeous and it was set up for a great run. Today was my first day back from vacation and worked until about 5:30, a typical day. My stomach was growling, like seriously growling before I wanted to head out, so I grabbed a protein bar to settle the hunger and to take my two vitamins also.

You can probably foresee what is going to happen...

I started out on my run and something just was not right. My pants kept falling down, I couldn't get my feet to really move, my calves were VERY tight and I was really trying to push myself. I kept repeating how awesome this would be, a nice, easy 4 miles. I had to walk a bit more in the beginning because I am having a bit of an issue, getting into a rhythm. I feel like I am starting over again.

So right after my first mile came in, everything started to hit me.

And it began..

My stomach was angry at me. My whole body started cramping. My sides were cramping, legs, I seriously could not move. I had to pause and walk for just a bit and catch my breath and then my stomach rumbled.

Yup, that rumble that tells you, you have only a little bit of time!!

You know what I mean!

Running the rest of the way was not an option for me at this point. Walking back was the only way and even that was a problem. My stomach had the worst cramps and to be quite blunt I was about to crap my pants!

I have never experienced this before, sure running I have the little toot toots here and there, but the whole I gotta go feeling, Nope!

Runners are known to have this issue, but geez I mean if it is going to happen to be I wanted to be next to a bathroom or at least close to home. Of course I was about a mile and half away from home.

The longest walk ever! If you saw me on the road tonight, sorry, I was trying to hold it all in and luckily I did.

I seriously was considering calling James to get me before I had an accident haha.

This is totally embarrassing but you know what it happens and I am sure it might happen to you at some point. Just know you are not alone, get somewhere fast and quick if you can too.

I ended up getting a total of 2 miles in, not what I wanted but after this little fun experience, I am taking it as a win and called it a night. There is always tomorrow.

And a little advice, maybe skip on the whey protein bar and vitamins right before!

Happy Hump Day! Something to make you laugh mid week

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Weekly Weigh In: Post Vacation

Well my vacation is officially over. It was fantastic, very, very cold but fantastic. I thought I did really well eating wise while away. I did notice I snacked a whole bunch, but with dinners, lunches and breakfast, when we ate out or when it was prepared, I made choices and saved most of my points for those meals. I also drank a lot of water, lots and lots of water the whole week. I took my green tea pill, vitamin and B-12 pill also every day all week.

Even though I wasn't able to run each day like I wanted too, I did run one day, did a core strength video and then a HIT work out also online. I made sure I got enough sleep each day. And ate when I was hungry, not just bored, but I did do that also.

I have to say the things I did wrong were, I didn't eat a lot of fruits and veggies like I normally do. I drank more coffee and I didn't measure out my portions. I snacked on items a lot during the day. I also should have worked out a little bit more. The videos on YouTube were amazing, I really should have done that every day and not just the two days, more activity is good activity.

But despite the things I did wrong, I did do something right because this morning when I went to weigh in, I actually lost 1 pound. Hey 1 pound is pretty freaking great considering the week I had. I am really proud of that 1 pound because every time I went home on vacation I always gained. So this was a big win for me.

I am just really hoping that this is a good start to my weight loss slump or roller coaster. So here is to a new week and I am really going to work hard this week to make that scale go down.

My vacation was wonderful, relaxing, everything I wanted, and no back to my regular programming.

Sunday, March 16, 2014

Last Full Day in NY

Today is my last "full" day home in NY. Tomorrow I fly back to Florida, the good thing is my flight isn't until 7:30 pm. I will get to spend the whole afternoon here in NY with my Poppy and family but then I won't get back to FL until 10:10 at night, which is kind of crappy. But I did take off the day from work on Tuesday, so I can get back to normal, unpack, I have a eye Doctors Appointment, get a long run in ( I seriously can not wait to run again) and warm up again.

I have to say the vacation home has been truly fantastic. I have loved everything I have been able to do and people I got to hang out with. I have got to relax and not worry about anything, no errands, nothing I do from my regular routine. I have been spoiled with meals taken care of, being carted around, etc. The one thing that has bothered me is the weather. I have been coming home for the last 2 years in March and each time the weather has been really nice. Sure, it has been cold, but not this cold ever before.

I mean today it is a high of 27 degrees. Going outside just made me miserable. The one real perfect day was Tuesday when I had my first day and I ran early in the morning. It was 30 degrees and after bundling up it wasn't too bad. But then it warmed up later and made up for it. Every morning since then it has been rainy, windy and freezing. I mean the wind is what is doing me in, I feel it in my bones and it makes me uncomfortable and considering I am not used to it, I don't think it is a very good idea. I can not get sick.

So yesterday I did a cardio HIT work out from Fitness Blender on YouTube. It was fantastic, 37 minutes and intense. I was breathing heavy and sweating like crazy. My muscles ache today, which is a great feeling. So even though I haven't been able to run, I got a great work out again. Today is a rest day because I seriously just want to be lazy for once. This is my first Sunday in forever, I was able to sleep in and do nothing. I mean in MONTHS!

Yesterday I met up with my best friend of 20 plus years, LeaAnn. We haven't seen each other in close to 2 years and seriously we picked up right where we left off. She lives in PA with her boyfriend, who is so sweet and perfect for her. It was great to finally meet him. So we don't get to see each other much, I was so happy we were able to spend time together the whole day yesterday.

It's crazy we have been best friends since we were in Elementary school. We have had our ups and downs in the past, but that is the past, you forgive and forget and move on. Both of us are in great times and parts of our lives right now and still make time for each other, via text messaging, etc. And when I am back in time, always try to get together. She seriously is the one person who really knows every single thing about me and then some. Lea will always be my best friend, no matter where life takes us.

We went to David's Bridal because her younger sister is getting married in September, which I will be home for. I can not believe her sister is getting married. She was like a little sister to me, crazy how time flies. They were picking out their bridesmaid dresses, it really is going to be a beautiful day. I am pretty excited to be flying home for the weekend for it.

We all went out for dinner at PF Changs, which I love anyway from back in Florida. We laughed a bunch and it just felt nice.

Take that Oscar Selfie!!!

And this morning I was able to go out to breakfast with my mom one last time for my vacation. We had a great morning and it has just been just what I needed and what my soul needed.

This vacation has been amazing but I am ready to be warm again!!

Friday, March 14, 2014

Birthdays, Lucky Charms and Health Food Stores

It is a Friday night and I have spent it curled up in my "home" living room with some of my favorite people in the whole world, my Poppy, his girlfriend, and my Uncle Kevin. We spent the evening watching the movie, About Time. We were warm, munched on jellybeans and had a really, really nice evening.

We ate baked macaroni and cheese, not made how I would do it in the healthy aspect, but oh my goodness was it a treat. Considering the weather has been so stinking cold I didn't run today and probably ate my weight in carbs, I really do not care, I am enjoying my whole time here with my family.

This trip truly has been fantastic. I am not a huge fan of the cold at all, but not to sound too corny, the love I have this week, has truly kept me warm. As much as I hate taking a time from running, I mean it has only been 3 days, might do me some good, get me back and well rested. If it is too cold tomorrow morning, I am going to do some cardio from YouTube. There are some really great work outs online, no excuses on my behalf. I did a core work out yesterday and my abs are still hurting, kind of love that feeling.

So today was a pretty great day. I had no real plans today, I actually slept in until 9:15 and just hung out around my Poppy's house, which I of course still consider home. I got caught up on some stuff online, paid my bills, enjoyed a childhood favorite of Lucky Charms and just enjoyed the joy of not having anything really to do.

 My Poppy came home late in the morning and we ran some errands together this afternoon.

I absolutely love when I can get some one on one time with him. It's these little moments that I really treasure because in actuality you never know when those moments will end. My Poppy and I have quite a bond, its very special. See my Poppy saved me.

When I was younger, my parents gave me a run of a childhood. I did not have a white picket fence, even though it may had seen like it, it was far from it. My parents did drugs and alcohol for most of my life and my mother was sent to prison for quite sometime. So we lost everything as a family. We had to sell our house and everything inside of it and move in with my Poppy. If it wasn't for him and giving us a place to live, I am not sure where I would be.

From that day forward, my Poppy and I grew quite a relationship. He made sure I had 3 meals a day, he made my lunches, went to all my school functions, taught me how to drive, he made sure that I never went down the path my parents, sort of paved for me. He took me on vacations with him, we went to the movies, played Bingo and some nights just stayed up and played 500 rummy, listening to Deliah and drinking hot tea. I miss those nights.

My Poppy became my rock and gave me strength I believe I never had. He was there for everything for me, all my home volleyball games, my prom, my awards and graduations. My friends considered and called him Poppy also. I love this man with everything I am and everything I have. Without him, I really don't know what I would do. I have such respect and honor for him. And he is the best man I could ever know. And no man will ever live up to his potential and legacy.

Why am I saying all this, well, because today is his 80th Birthday. He is a man of very little excitement and didn't want much of anything and if he did, he would never tell you. So I just spent the day being around him, because I know that is what makes him really happy and god does it make me even happier.

After spending a great afternoon with him, I went back out to get him some scratch offs as a birthday gift, he loves those things and then swung by a Natural Food Store I had seen my whole life but never went in. It also happened to be right next to the best Dunkin Donuts, seriously no DD makes the coffee like the one from my hometown.

Here are the goodies I picked up from the Natural Food Store I went to...

I was very excited to find the Enjoy Life Dark Chocolate Morsels. I couldn't find them around me and then the same with the Better Stevia. I had seen a great post about adding that to a thing of Diet coke and making it like a Coconut Diet Coke, which I am all about. The Sharkies I have had before from a RunnerBox I got, but wasn't sure where I could find them and I loved them. I was shocked to see them there. I was actually shocked to see everything I got there, I really wish I had taken advantage of a healthier lifestyle earlier because this place really had it all. Small store but packed with everything and anything and very reasonably priced for the items you were getting.

And then that was really the end of my day until our movie time. I did do some reminiscing in our attic for some stuff to find, such as old pictures, etc. I found a bunch of stuff but I can't take it all back on the plane with me. I figure all of it has been sitting up there for 10 years now, long forgotten, chapters have ended and everyone has moved on in those pictures and memories. That is exactly what they all are too, just memories. So my family can clean up the attic and do what they want with the stuff.

Not much of a post but I guess I just felt like writing. Here are some selfies I took well you know just because...

Common theme, I am bundled up like a tick lol!

Hope you are all having a wonderful week!!!

Fab Finds: Fiber One 90 Calorie Caramel Sea Salt Bar

I love Target.


Seriously I could go there for anything and nothing. I mean I am on vacation and wanted to go and check out Target. Yesterday was a day I really wanted to just get out of the house anyway. It was freezing cold, seriously 10 degrees! I don't even know how to handle that kind of cold. I went outside and my hat was frozen on my head and it being the anniversary of my Dad, I just wanted to be doing something.

So to get out of the house and just do something besides sitting and watching TV, we went to the mall, which also happens to have a Target with it.

Score! I would probably be broke if I had a Target in my mall.

I had seen on Instagram, someone posted a picture of a new Fiber One product. See this is why I love Instagram, I can find new products before I even shop, which also gives me an excuse to go out and find them.

Anyway, I was on a mission to find these bars because OF COURSE, I could not wait until I got back to Florida. And low and behold I was able to find them!

Okay, first off I have to say they had me at Caramel and Sea Salt. I swear I gravitate towards anything with that on the label, even though you can never taste the sea salt, I think I just like the idea of salty and sweet. I also gravitate towards anything that potentially is low in points, like these.

One bar is only 2pp and 90 calories, just like the box says. I have been a fan of Fiber One bars before, especially the lemon and coffee cake flavors. James really likes the original, Fiber One 90 Calorie Brownie. 

Here is the thing, I know a lot people say they taste artificial, there bad for you, clean eating, blah blah blah. I am not a nutritionist and never claimed to be. Believe me far from it. These are all my opinions on items I enjoy or have tried. I don't eat clean all the time, I know it would be a far stretch for me, I like food and to limit myself, yeah it is cheating me out of good things. BUT I eat in moderation and try to make the best choices and these bars are a best choice for me. Because instead of me eating a whole cake, pie or regular brownie, I would go for these.

End rant.

These bars are too die for. I loved them. My cousin and I both enjoyed one yesterday with a coffee from Starbucks and it was on point. I think they would be even better warmed up a bit. It is a perfect treat size and can be paired for a breakfast, snack or dessert. 

They are found only at Target and from what the box says a limited time only. They are 2.99 a box and I picked up two because one I will have while here in NY and then bring back a box for home, since I probably wont make a Target trip anytime soon, ha, who am I kidding really!

I thought these were really good and glad I could find them. 

Go ahead and pick up a box for yourself and be the judge!

Thursday, March 13, 2014

With just one phone call...

Today is one of those days for me I will never forget. And as I am sitting here typing this, the moment my life changed happen exactly right now at 8:45 am, two years ago, March 13, 2012.

I had woken up late for work and was really regretting now using the day as a PTO day. See the day before I had met my cousins and Uncle in Orlando to spend the day at Universal Studios with them. I hadn't seen them in over a year and since I only live a hour away from Orlando, I thought it would be a perfect day. And it was. But I got home late and was exhausted and was feeling it the next morning. James and I had gotten into a fight and we weren't really talking much this morning.

I started making my coffee and was just about to head out the door and then the house phone rang...

I remember looking at the house phone in panic because NO ONE calls our house phone, not even sure why we had it to begin with...

The caller ID showed that it was coming from my HOME back in NY, which home as in where my poppy, Uncle and Father lived. Immediately I took a deep breath, knowing someone from there calling this early in the morning and on the house phone wasn't going to be a good thing. I thought for sure the person on the other line was going to tell me my Poppy was in trouble.

But on the other line it was my Poppy..

I tried to sound chipper when I answered but I had started to shake already just waiting for the blow..

My Poppy told me he didn't know how to tell me this..

My Father had died.

In his words was my Daddy was gone..

The only reaction I had was to scream No and drop to the floor. I literally repeated no over and over and over and over. I kept yelling I didn't get to say goodbye. "Poppy your lying" " I didn't get to say goodbye" "This isn't true"

At this point I went completely numb. My mind, body and everything around me.  I was on the floor in the fetal position for a bit, just hugging myself while I had to hand the phone to James so he could talk to my Poppy. Then it hit me.

I had to figure out work and everything. I called my other TM and of course continued to break down and just asked if she could take care of everything. Honestly the last thing I was thinking about at this moment was work.

I called my mother and cried more. The phone calls, texts, everything started coming through. I was trying to think of all the people I had to call. I was crawling on the floor, then dropping to crying. I know I blacked out for a bit from just the shock.

It was a nightmare and I couldn't wake up.

I remember laying on the couch, just staring off into space and then just sobbing. The idea of losing my father and never being able to hear his voice or see him again, was something I never knew how to handle.

I remember I called his cellphone just to see if he would answer.

He of course didn't...

The whole day I was in a fog but James tried really hard to get me going and not sit home and deal with it. I wanted to be home with my family more than anything, but I was in no way able to fly that day. James and I went about our day and my mother booked my flight home. I went about my typical Tuesday routine just so I could feel normal because I knew for the rest of the week I was not going to.

James took care of me that day and made me feel just a little bit normal. I will love him for that my whole life.

Numerous times of the day I cried and just cried, but I settled myself and found comfort talking to my family throughout the day.

I took the earliest flight the next morning and spent the week up here in NY with my family. I think I went through all stages of grief and I have never cried so much in my life like that week.

I still thought when I got home he would be here.

I never got to say goodbye to my father or see him afterwards. We had him cremated and no one would let me see him. Apparently he did not look like my father, he was bloated, blue and just not the picture they thought I should have. A part of me is happy they blocked me from doing that and then another part, always wishes you could see them one last time.

I hadn't talked my father in almost a month because he refused to call me back. I know and I think now for the stories I heard it was because he was ashamed of the path he had taken and figured it would have been easier for me. I wish he just thought more about that decision because one last I love you, one last goodbye was all I wanted and I never, ever will get that chance.

So it's been two years and it doesn't get easier. The whole week I was home for it, I hurt so bad. Then when I went back to Florida I hurt even more because I wasn't around my family, I needed that comfort or to just be able to look at someone and see my father in them.

I figured each year I would come home and "celebrate" his anniversary with them. Not that we celebrate anything, we know what happened today 2 years ago. But I do it just to heal me. Being in the house, being in the house where he died, just being home with family, looking at everyone that looks just like him, well, it makes me heal a little bit more.

We are making his favorite meal today and I am sure I will have my own little moment in remembrance of him. As much as some people want to forget the day, I embrace it, even if it hurts like freaking hell because while we lost an amazing father, brother, son, Uncle and friend, he might have been reborn again.

My father was a depressed man and he battled with many demons. Demons he just couldn't control or handle. He died with an enlarged heart, due to drinking and drugs. My father died alone in his bed, thinking no one loved him.

That's the hardest thing to gasp because he never was truly alone.

Alcoholism is a passion of mine, while I don't know how to pursue anything with it. I get the struggle because I watched it take over my father. I watched what it did to a family and a man. I know it is a disease, it is a disease, yes it isn't cancer or anything like that but people have to realize it is a horrible disease that yes you control, but sometimes you just aren't strong enough.

My father gave up. He just gave up and gave in and figured he was going to go on his own terms. He lived his whole life that way.

So my trip home really at times is all about this day. It may be selfish on my part but it helps me. Talking about my dad, reading about my dad, it helps me heal. But I don't mourn my father, sure it hurts like hell, and I want to say it ***cking hurts, but well I am not sure if anyone will read this.

My life changed two years ago today, I can still feel every emotion and I recount everything that went on. And I know years from now it will just be a day and the pain will go away. "They" say it gets easier and say that is bullshit. It doesn't get easier, I just think we tend to just move on. We tend to not dwell on the past and live in the present. But it haunts me at every holiday, his death day, his birthday, my birthday.

It haunts me and reminds me that my father is no longer here with me and never will be.

And then I come home and see my family is doing just fine and so can I.

So daddy, which I am sure your not reading this and maybe you are. It has been two years since you left me.  I miss and love you every day. Not a day, moment or year goes by that I don't think of you. I miss just hearing your voice and seeing your face. I miss your hugs and your laughter. I miss sitting around the table eating dinner with you and listening to you tell stories of your day. I miss the smell of cement and your tools. I miss seeing you light up every time I came around. No one does that like you did. I miss watching shows with you and listening to you take on the accents after words. Anything and everything you did I miss. I miss the really great times and I miss the really bad times, because with out them we wouldn't have had the great times. I want you to always know I loved you, I may not have shown it, or I was mad at what you were doing to your life, but know I loved you always. You were my daddy and nothing would ever change that. I hope your at peace now and I hope you have found some happiness. Don't worry about me, I know you can see me crying while I am writing this, but that is okay. I need to cry, it is my release. It helps me feel. Even though we didn't get to say goodbye, you did not disappoint me, or anger me or let me down. You were the strongest man I know, and you did the best YOU could with everything. You gave me a great life, and yes it was bad and shitty at times growing up, but I wouldn't be that strong girl you knew without those troubles. I learned more from you than you could ever know. So rest easy knowing I am okay, I am actually pretty great. I will cry for you always and miss you even more. But promise me always that you stay happy and run beside me.

Love Always Your Little Girl,

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Mom Day

I am having issues logging into my account so I have to type this from my phone, so please excuse the grammar I will have going on! Mainly this post is a recap of my amazingly awesome day that I had yesterday with my Mom. When I am home I try to spend at least one full day with her because the rest I spend with my Poppy and my dad's side of the family because it is so special to me to be with them this time of year. But yesterday was my mama/daughter day. We started our day at Trader Joe's! We don't have one in Florida yet, we are getting on very soon, so since I was home I figured it would be something run to do! I picked up some awesome items but I will post those pictures later on.

That's my Mama!

Of course we took two picture, gotta find the perfect one.

My mom just started a new job 8 months ago and she loves it, she works at AAA and I'm so happy for her because she finally has something she likes to do after being out of work for a whole year. She took me to her office and proudly showed me off and me around her daily routine.

After a tour, we went to a Italian Market called Cardona's and had lunch. I did take a picture but my email is being crazy it got deleted. The market was small but had a whole tasting room of cheeses! It was heaven for me. As you can guess, I'm cheating a little bit here and there on WW this week. But I am very mindful of what I am eating. 

We each order a sandwich and then some tomato and mozzarella and then a 7 layer cookie to eat for dessert. Our favorite cookie of all time. 

With full bellies we went back to my Mom's house to just relax a bit. I had been up since 5:00am that day because of course on vacation I can never seem to allow myself to sleep in. I try really hard but never seem too. So since I was up so early I got in 3 miles in the freezing cold.

I bundled up really good with lots of layers! Once I got going I felt fine and warmed up pretty quick.

Okay sorry I got off track. We came back and I passed out in a nap for about an hour. I mean passed the heck out, I was drooling in my sleep I was sleeping so hard. I think the fresh air and being around my mom is what did me in.

After a refreshing nap, we got up and got back on the road to see my Aunt.

But before we had to take a picture of me looking and feeling fantastic...

 Sometimes transformation Tuesdays aren't about side by side pictures but how amazing you feel on the inside and how it shows on the outside. I would never have nor could I ever wear something like this before. Then it just happens and you embrace who you are and love how you look and it comes full circle. 

 And it doesn't help to have an awesome support system like her!

We met my Aunt at the melting pot for dinner. Not the healthiest choice but we split everything and being everything was bite sized it was awesome. We got Fiesta Cheese fondue, which came with veggies, bread and chips and then for dinner chicken, steak, mushrooms, brocoli and potatoes. 

I have never been before and the food was pretty good! We had a blast and for 3 hours we laughed non stop. We enjoyed two glasses of wine a piece and of course I had to take a picture with my Aunt who is one of my most favorite people in the world, she is also my godmother. We have a bond and relationship like no other. I'm so blessed and grateful for her. 

We needed our dinner with chocolate covered strawberries because my aunt got them for free with a birthday coupon.

Haha she'll hate me for putting this up, but I love it! This is my mother, goofy and crazy all the time. 

After a little bit more with my mom and some shopping we said goodbye to my Aunt and went back home. I was exhausted but my mom and I sat up for a couple of more hours and hung out watching tv and chatting.

My mom and I fight a lot and bicker but she really is one of my best friends. She is all I have left of a parent and can't imagine my life with out her. I really do cherish my time with her when I get to have it.

Today we are hanging out a little bit more, the weather looks really bad and rain any second, so I'm using today as a rest day fun running and taking in a day off Northern style.

Happy Middle of the Week!!!

Monday, March 10, 2014

Flights, Smooches & Home

I am back home!!!!

I made it safely and quite great actually. The flight was terrific, on time and no issues whats so ever. I read the whole time. I have never flown out of this airport or airline before so I was excited to try it. I mean for half off the cost of what I normally fly, I really couldn't beat it.

After my Weigh In this morning and getting all my ducks in a row at work, I came home and showered and James and I went out for lunch. I of course wanted Chipotle. I know I wont have that here back home, so I needed my quick fix.

James dropped me off at the airport and hung out with me for a bit, until I had to go through security. I picked up some almonds to snack on and a Diet Dr. Pepper for before hand. My luggage was over the limit and I had to unload some stuff because for 8 pounds over I was not paying 50.00 extra bucks. I am the worst packer by the way. I ALWAYS pack too much. So letting some things go was probably a good idea and if worse come to worse, I can always go shopping.

James and I have a tradition and it is super cute. Any time I fly, he always takes a going away picture so he can use it as the background to his phone.

I swear he kills me! Then we take a picture together, give smooches and on my way I go.

I had a good hour so I started reading Chelsea Handler's new book which I bought for my Nook. I love her and have read each and every one of her books. I read it from before the plane and on the plane and I have only 40 pages left.

I also got a piece of chocolate, 60 calories and it was like chocolate pop rocks, it sizzled and popped my mouth. I was not expecting that but welcomed the odd taste.

It feels amazing to just start and finish a book. I have a goal to at least get through two books this vacation. I even brought magazines and I didn't even open them.

Once I landed I was greeted by my Poppy, whom as you all know by now is the man of my life. I was so happy to see him waiting for me. We got my luggage, got caught up on life and stopped a service station for dinner. Not the best place, but I got a grilled chicken sandwich, some fresh fruit, side salad and fat free dressing. Turned out to be perfect!

We went to the grocery store to get some things and now I am unpacked a bit and unwinding. The busy day is catching up to me and I am going to be going to bed very shortly. The weather here is cold and there is snow. I haven't seen snow in 6 years, granted nothing much has changed in the look of it but it is cool to see.

I am attempting in the morning to get a couple of miles in, nothing crazy because the weather is taking a big shock to my system, but I am shooting for at least 2 miles. I know once I get moving I get warm, I just don't want to over do it and get myself sick. I mean it could be like 20 degrees difference for me. But I am going to attempt at least every day.

Tomorrow morning I get to see my mom and my Poppy and I will be having breakfast. It is the little things on these trips that I enjoy the very most. Just the quite downtime, the breakfasts and meals and just being in the same room with family that makes it so worth it.

I feel at such peace being back here in my Poppy's house. It seriously makes my heart whole.

And because I was feeling extra cute, I had to send a smooch face to James. On another note, the lady who did my eyebrows, did a bang up job! I feel like a new person!

Vacation Time & A Quick Weekly Weigh In

Vacation has officially started! I leave for the airport in a couple of hours and then I arrive in New York around 6:30. I love flying and I especially love airports. I love to people watch and I feel so important when I get on a plane. I am all packed, except for my make-up and hair stuff, but other than that I am ready to go.

I got up earlier this morning so I could get one more run in before I head home. I know it is going to be so cold up North, so I wanted one more warm, sunny and flat land running. There are tons of hills where I am from. I got a 5k in this morning and it felt great. There is no greater feeling then working up a good sweat doing something you love.

I had to take some conference calls this morning and then I decided to hold myself accountable to go and weigh in at Weight Watchers, since I wont be there tomorrow. Weighing in after a run is probably not the best idea. I showed I gained 1.4, which I know was all water weight from the run this morning. I retain a lot of water. But I weighed in and held myself accountable.

On this vacation I probably will not track. It's just a little harder because I am a bit out of my element and eating foods I normally do not. Now does that mean I am going to be eating pizza, ice cream, etc, well if I do then so be it. But will I gorge myself to death and go off the deep end, ABSOLUTELY not!! I know better, I know the choices I should make. Will I say no to food I can't have while I live here, nope.

I am going to enjoy my vacation with my family. I usually track my breakfast and lunches and then enjoy my dinners. I am hoping to run at least 3-4 times this trip and I am packing my Biggest Loser DVD for the days where it is just too cold. I brought my WW mini bars with me, smoothies and of course my beloved Quest Bars.

I am excited to see my family because I have lost so much inches from the last time I was home, I do look a bit different. I love this vacation time because it means so much to me and I get a lot of down time. I will be posting a bunch while I am home, so be prepared for lots of updates.

Hope you have a great Monday...

Sunday, March 9, 2014

My Happiness...

This right here is....


No filter need on this picture. This is my happiness spot. I just got done running a great 8 miles. Finished in an hour and 32 minutes, a pace of 11:36, a little slower than normal, but I was just out there to get the mileage this morning. Just taking it all in. Today starts my vacation and I cant imagine starting it any other way then with a nice long run on a Sunday morning.

My happiness is the feeling of sweat all down my face and body, the sun pouring in on my face, my legs tired and sore for the miles. The way I just feel at peace and accomplished. This picture just shows how  much running is more than races, or speed, or time or anything like that, running is my time and it is my happiness.

Happy Sunday!

Saturday, March 8, 2014

Graze Box: First Box For Free!!!

So on Instagram someone I followed posted a picture of this subscription box with a free code to try it for free. I love anything free and I love subscription boxes so I figured I would give it a try.

I went to the website and looked around really liked what I was seeing. The box comes in four compartments. The items in the box are nuts, seeds, dried fruit and coated raisins. The flavors sound and look amazing..they have two types of boxes, their regular one and then the Calorie Counter box, which has lower calorie mixes. I of course went for the calorie counter box. Look what can be in it...

hot cross yum
sponge pieces, cinnamon and honey almonds and orange infused raisins

This is right up my alley!!! They send you a new box every two weeks and it is only 6.00 a box. I spend 6.00 alone on just almonds for myself, now I can have a true treat. My first and fifth box are free but now you can also try the box for free with this code:

Just follow this link and the code will take it off and you get your first box free. I think this might become a great staple in my life and you can cancel anytime, so why not try it for free first!!

Friday, March 7, 2014

First Friday

Okay so I am getting so excited for my trip back home to New York!!!!

I seriously can not wait. I have some things lined up with seeing my mom and best friend of forever! And doing things with my Poppy, but mainly it is just time away from work and everything. I don't have to worry about running errands, cooking, cleaning, etc. I can just relax and hang out.

I plan on catching up on some reading of magazines and especially books. I am going to try to run at least 6 of the days. The weather is freezing back home, like 26 degrees, this Florida girl is not used to that. But for days I just cant get a good run in, I am going to bring my Biggest Loser DVD also.

I usually buy myself some food items when I am home to keep me on track, mainly snack items and yogurt. I know I can make good choices and I plan on having splurges with dinners because my Poppy always makes me my favorite meals when I am home and I always go for seconds, since I cant get them throughout the year. If I gain, I gain. I am enjoying my vacation and using the time to just come back full circle.

And mainly just relax!!!!

This morning was a good one, I got up early again and meet my friend Jacke for a 3 mile run. I took it at a nice, comfortable slower pace this morning, and it was good. I got ready for work and had some oatmeal mixed with fresh raspberries and Mango Jam. Perfect combination by the way.

The other day I went to Plato's Closet and actually got this shirt for only 5.00 bucks..

Loved it! I would never be able to wear something like that before. I really need to start getting new work pants, those were a tad too big.

Now spending the rest of the night hanging out with James. We rend Dallas Buyers Club and I am so excited to watch it because of Matthew McCoughney. Yum!

Hope you all had a great Friday

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Sixth Half Marathon Signed Up and Ready To Go

2014 Iron Girl Clearwater Banner

Alright, Alright, Alright!!!

Signed up and ready to go for this Half Marathon!!

I ran it last year with my boss and some of her friends, unfortunately she can't run it this year but I am running it with one of my very best friends Jacke! We haven't ran a race together since Gasparilla last year, so this will be extra fun. This race was a tough one last year, as it has 2 bridges that you go over twice, which is out of the ordinary for this flat land, Florida running girl. But Jacke and I are going to try and run the course weeks before to get more prepared.

This race has a great atmosphere and it really has a special place in my heart. I ran the 5k for this race, two years ago, my first ever official race. I remember after that race saying, I am going to run the half one day for this. I remember that feeling of completing a race, something I have never done before, I mean it was out of this world exciting. I love this race because I get all those feelings back again.

It is a great time and a huge accomplishment for me and to see how far I truly have come and where I am headed.

So who is running this race also??!!

Weekly Weigh In: Forgot To Share Yesterday

So with a busy Tuesday yesterday I completely forgot to write about my Weekly Weigh In that I normally post. I was so excited to write about new products I have found, it slipped my mind. Maybe a good thing because it wasn't all that exciting and exciting at the same time.

Since I had to work yesterday, I weighed in after work and honestly I feel like every weigh in is different and no clue what to expect. I am really struggling with fueling my body and fighting cravings and fighting hunger, but it is process and I am getting there for sure.

Last week I had a crazy gain of 6 pounds. CRAZY! I knew it had a lot to do with the sodium I had ingested with all the running of the weekend and my body all out of wack. So this week I was hoping that it would come off some and it did. I lost 4.2 pounds. I was thrilled, I worked hard but I didn't stress. When I focus on every little thing, I lose myself and lose what I am doing and I stress.

So this past week I just went back to basics and if I ate over my points, I ate over my points. I didn't get upset, I just lived. I have been doing Weight Watchers for over 3 years now, I know the drill. I know what is good for me and what isn't, but my body is not the same body I started out Weight Watchers with 3 years ago, as I adjusted to looking and seeing my new body, I have to adjust and fuel my new body in ways I wasn't even doing a year ago.

I have lost almost 80 pounds, that is a lot of weight and I am going to have months, weeks and days that just don't make sense. I have to remember that, I am not dropping weight to win a competition, I am doing this for the rest of my life and I am doing this for me, to be better.

Since I had that strange weight gain, I have been looking at my body differently. I keep comparing to what I looked like this time last year, or last week for that matter. I am taking selfies like it is my job! I am annoying myself with it. I guess I just fear that I can easily fall back into what I had once become. But that's crazy, I know that,  I am better and stronger than I ever was and I lost 4.2 pounds in a week, that's a huge thing.

So every time I look at myself in the mirror, I am going to say how much I adore and love of about myself. I went through my closet today and donated and sold some clothes that just weren't me anymore and used the money I got back and bought 6 new shirts to make me feel better and express me. And I know Monday when I weigh in again, I will see a loss, a loss of weight but not a loss of me, I will gain more confidence than before.

This is different from most weekly weigh in posts, but I just went with it. I guess it has been just one of those moments where I have been looking in the mirror and seeing all my imperfections, like my arm jiggle, my stomach bloat and big legs, rather than seeing how far I have come and writing it out helps a whole lot!

So here is to next week, this week I will continue my process and love myself a little bit more each day. And I suggest you do the same also.