I went to weigh in today and I had another gain... 4.8 pounds!!
I was shocked and stunned and taken back. I have never really gotten upset but today I felt upset. That number stung because I feel I am doing everything right. I work out, eat right, take my vitamins, finally getting more sleep, I fuel my body and drink water. I ran alone 20 miles on Sunday!
And I know on all my really long run weeks, I gain. My muscles are sore, they are heavy and I feel bloated but I mean come on scale. I beat myself up over it for a bit, staring at that number. I texted Nanci, I had to get in contact with another marathon, WW. She of course got me back on track, it's so amazing being able to share that with someone else.
I then posted it to my Instagram and then was flooded with comments of support, motivation and slapping me back to reality!! Social media and friends telling me how far I have come and what I am accomplishing. Telling me the scale doesn't matter, I'm taking care of my body, I'm running a god damn marathon, despite what the scale says. Saying don't look at that number, your building muscle and it will come off. Eat to fuel your body!!
It was what it needed. I needed that support, guidance and encouragement. Even though, yes I was a bit embarrassed by the number, I needed other people to say it.
And it helped. I looked at myself in the mirror with no clothes on and saw a difference. I saw my legs changing, my butt getting smaller, my thighs sharpening and my stomach laying a bit flatter. My body is indeed changing.. But it is changing into something better, something I have never seen it be before, athletic!!
So I'll take the gains when I have to and celebrate the losses but I won't give up. I won't cry or whine, I will never give up because I have come to long and life is even better besides what the scale says.
Just like I am stronger than the miles, I'm better than that number on the scale.